From Nothing to Something

I just finished one of the most depressing/optimistic testimonies out there these days. Eric Clapton was a man who was full of addictions of all sorts: music, sex, fishing, collectables, and the most deadly of all, hard drugs. Even though this would seem to lead to his downfall, it's what made him one of the greatest guitarists to ever strap in to play. He never did anything half-assed and I can respect that.

He describes his addictions and explains how devastating it was for his friends and family to witness. The first forty years of this man's life were filled with disappointment, death, abandonment, confusion, insecurity, and lonliness - and that's not an exageration by any means. He got to the point where he couldn't go a few hours without some sort of drug to get him through. He was drinking 2 bottles of vodka a day. It got extremely ugly.

And then the straw that broke the camels back slapped him in the face. Conor, his 4 year old son, fell 53 floors out of a high-rise apartment to his tragic death.

And it's in these moments where you see the character of an individual.

It's in these moments where God does His most magnificient work...

"At that moment, almost of their own accord, my legs gave way and I fell to my knees. In the privacy of my room I begged for help. I had no notion who I was talking to, I just knew I had come to the end of my tether, I had nothing left to fight with. Then I remembered what I had heard about surrender, something I thought I could never do, my pride just wouldn't allow it, but I knew that on my own, I wasn't going to make it, so I asked for help, and getting down on my knees, I surrendered.

From that day until this I have never failed to pray in the morning, on my knees, asking for help, and at night, to express gratitude for my life, and most of all, for my sobriety.

I choose to kneel because I need to humble myself when I pray, and with my ego, this is the most I can do.

If you are asking why I do this, I will tell you...because it works. It's as simple as that. In all this time I've
been sober, I have never once seriously thought of taking a drink or a drug."

And that's straight from a man who spent forty years disregarding the presence of God. That's straight from a
man who has been to hell and back. That's from a man who has been completely humbled by the grace of God.

It's such a beautiful story because something so self-defeating became something that has changed thousands of lives. Eric Clapton started the "Crossroads Centre" in Antigua which is a rehab treatment center for all kinds of addictions. It exists to help individuals and their families whose lives are controlled by alcohol, drugs or other compulsive behaviors – helping them to make the changes necessary to find new health, a new sense of well-being and a new life of recovery.

It's a beautiful thing when God takes something ugly and makes it wonderful again. Check out Eric Clapton's Autobiography and you'll see what I mean.

KL.

Reign of Love

Hold on.

Be good to one another.

Spend time with your thoughts in surround sound.

Don't worry about yesterday.  The sun will rise tomorrow.

Don't recycle revenge.  Stop it with you.

No one will fire if you wave the white flag and put the weapons down.  Whether it's a thought or a word - please be peaceful.

Don't "wait" for the world to change, you be the change you want to see in the world.  Realize it starts with individuals deciding they want a different life, a different vibe, a different world.

Listen more and talk less.  

Engage those who appear lost.  Listen to their story.

See more shows - art shows, concerts, galleries, etc.  Appreciate someone else's talents.  Root for them.

Seek truth and realize you will never have it all nailed.  

Travel and admit that there's a much bigger world out there than you.

Much love to all.  KL.

Got Your Back

What really does it mean to say "I love you?"

I've asked myself this question countless times. Love is such a beautiful concept and I often wonder what it really means. I wonder if we minimize the term when we say "I love Subway" or "I love that black polo"...What does it mean to love something, or perhaps someone?

Lately I've been thinking about this:

"I've got your back."

Think about what that means.

It means no matter what you do, I'm behind you. No matter what you say, I'm in your corner. No matter what, I got your back. I can't think of a more appropriate image of love.

I got your back.

So from now on, I'm going to show love by my actions and say that I've got your back. I've learned talk is cheap and that it means absolutely nothing until you back it up with movement, with progression, with rhythm. It's so easy to just settle in and become static with relationships but it's time we all start thinking about what we mean when we say "I love you..."

So please, say it more often. But more importantly, back it up with action. KL.

Hilarious

Check out this story. His picture says it all...

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/7526628.stm

KL.

Rhythm

If you've ever watched a band play live, you know what this is. The drums, the bass, and the guitar must all be in rhythm to be able to play something that resonates to the core of the audience. The original word for rhythm comes from the Greek word "rhythmos" which means any measured flow, movement, or progression.

This is about fighting off the "vultures" to eventually find RHYTHM.

This is about celebrating life when things just seem to flow and rising above the disappointment when they don't. This is about never throwing in the towel, no matter what. Anyone can collapse when the rain picks up but it takes courage to walk through the storm to the other side (and here's the important part): holding your head high through the entire journey.

This is about choosing freedom over resentment, choosing patience over instant gratification, choosing the hard-fought victory over the easy way out. This is about actions speaking louder than words. This is about the girl who steps into her new shoes and begins to understand why they feel so sweet - because she didn't fall hard to the temptation of giving up, she doesn't believe in the white flag. She instead walks through the door labeled "persistance", which then quickly takes her to the most beautiful place a person can experience: harmony, uninterrupted happiness, and ultimately, peace.

This is about being persistant in the moment but also realizing that it's not the last hurdle to overcome. This is about the guy who sets out to run 3 miles but runs 4 instead because he's preparing for tomorrow.

This is about accepting who you are today and finding someone who will love you through the liabilities.
This is about the college student who changes her major a half a dozen times and still has no clue where she wants to be. But she doesn't stop pushing herself; she tries new things and eventually finds exactly the career she was looking for. This is about waiting for what you want but proactively seeking it.

This is about caring more about others than about ourselves.

This is about ending this war and bringing our troops home where they belong. This is about peace. This is about Obama's ideas on changing things.

This is about the pursuit of harmony, the expression of creativity, and the appreciation of unknown waters.

This is about all of us wanting to become more than we are.

This is about rhythm. KL.

From Deep Down...

I've had a crazy last few days. I drove 6 hours north to Niagara Falls and saw the most beautiful waterfall ever, drove another hour and a half north to Toronto to see John Mayer, and last night I went with some friends to see him again in "Dirty" Jersey. I sit here with my coffee feeling more inspired than I've ever been in my entire life - and it feels amazing.

I realize my bias here; I've been a fan of JM for years. I have rooted for him and I (probably) always will root for him - I say probably because "always" is a word I've learned to be very careful about. Anyways, back to the point.

The first may be something that you don't want to think about (I don't either, but it leads to something very important) and what we want to hear and what we need to hear usually feel very different. There's a reason for that.

It's about judgments, assumptions, and stereotypes - it's about the most dangerous drug we can experiment with. There's the appetizer, here's the entree.

If you think about what judgment is at it's core, it's essentially someone saying that they have some sort of standard that isn't congruent with yours. It's when things are not in harmony, the exact oposite of "shalom". Judgment can be anything; something as simple as "Your shoes suck!" or "You listen to John Mayer?!? He's such a douche." A sense of judgment originates with arrogance and here's where it turns toxic:

Judgment leads to self-consciousness, which then inevitably leads to a level of insecurity that has permeated our culture and has become extremely poisonous to every single one of us. I realize there's dark and there's light. I need to be clear here; I'm referring to preferences, not morals.

But negativity never frees the captive, it only enslaves them longer and brings about more injustice. So think about your words and always remember that sticks and stones will break your bones but words will always do more damage (yes, I know I said "always"). Enjoy who you are tonight, not who you would be if you changed this or that - and that means accepting the insecurities and the talents. Push yourself to be the best you can be? Absolutely. But always make sure you have plans Friday night for fear of sitting alone in your room? Not anymore. I'm done with that approach.

Don't tear others down in an attempt to build yourself up. Root for others. Celebrate with them when they work hard to succeed and take them out to dinner when they're "covered in rain" because things didn't quite go as planned.

I truly believe love can set us free, we just have to let it. KL.

Keep Moving

There is just so much to say and so little time; but I need to share some truth with you. I unfortunately have come to realize that life is shorter than we expect or ever truly comprehend. People talk so much about "mid-life" crisis but I'm feeling more like there's an inevitable "quarter-life" crisis that hits around your mid-20's. Almost every adult I know between the ages of 18-25 are frustrated with where they are because this sobering question won't go away, "Is this all there is?"

From the time we were running around carrying Super Mario lunchboxes, we were told that we could become anything we want. Really? Anything? There's two things I've always wanted to be: the 2nd baseman for the Philadelphia Phillies (if it wasn't for that Chase Utley fellow) or a performer of some sort - preferably a singer.

After arriving in Niagara Falls, I met one hell of a Canadian who had hair down to his back and a smile that went from ear to ear. Perhaps one of the most laid back people I've met, he ushered us out to his porch and we were instantaneoulsy in a different world - a beautiful world. I went from hearing loud noises in the city to hearing the quiet of the country. I went from wondering where I was to kicking my feet up on a chair without a care in the world.

If you're not careful, you'll miss these moments. They walk by us so often without warning but on this day, I knew I was going to stop to listen, to sit on the porch, to relax. I had to - mainly because when truth hits our existence and coincides with our "belief" systems, we can't help but slow down and inhale. And hopefully smile ear to ear.

Life rarely fits perfectly in the picture frame (the way we originally thought it up) but it's important, and even essential, to keep moving - to refuse to settle for becoming static. You'll see if you just give it time, you'll find what you're looking for. I know I did and it's so much better than the original drawing ever would've been. But I wouldn't have known that if I didn't keep moving.

So keep moving, find a new interest. Decide to learn something new everyday. Don't ever settle for the status quo. If it feels good right away, you haven't bought a big enough canvas. Pick up an instrument you've never played and find a melody that resonates deep within your being. And when you finally hit that note, realize that no one can ever take that away from you. No matter what.

Want what your heros want, not what your heros have. KL.

I'm Not Together But I'm Gettin There...

"Don't give up, give up, give up." KL.

If You Love Me, Won't You Let Me Know?

I've never really found it advantageous either for myself or for others to hold my cards close to my chest and expect others to read my two pair, ace high. Growing up in a home where both my brother and I were taught to tell others how we felt has allowed me to reject this notion our country has - that men are forbidden to express feelings, especially feelings of emotion, vulnerability, and love. It breaks my heart to hear someone tell me, "My dad never told me he loved me" or "My brother never hugs me"...that's about the point in the conversation where I hug them tight and tell them they are loved.

Now before I come across as being overly sentimental, I realize there's a time to show composure in a moment of weakness. I strongly believe in the man being solid emotionally. Fair enough, but I think it's gotten a little out of hand.

The typical American father spends more time working toward the promotion than teaching him about the right way to treat people (especially women). We're more concerned with buying the addition to the house than sitting down with her and asking her about herself. We care more about buying the new jet ski than instilling grace, honesty, and ultimately love.

My mom recently told me about someone she knows who has devoted his entire life to his career. He drives a sweet car, lives in a big house, and pretty much can afford any vacation he wants. However, his son once told him that he'd trade his time for his gifts anyday of the week. Interesting.

It's time to condense the post for the reader...

It all comes down to priorities.

What's important to you? What's important to your family? What if our country cared more about family than materialism? How would our families look different? How would our children look different?

I have a deep sense of hope for the future of families in America. I urge you, the reader, to stop and think about someone you love. Perhaps it's your aunt, your spouse, or your child. When's the last time you hugged them? When's the last time you told them they were beautiful? When's the last time you said "I love you"?

Don't hold back any longer. Kiss her when you leave for work and see the difference it makes when you get home. Send her flowers for no reason at all; not because it's Valentine's Day or because you screwed up. Do it without any ulterior motives or without hidden expectations of getting "play" after a glass of wine. Do it because you love her with every inch of your being and you couldn't think of a better way to spend a couple bucks. And finally, please...

Say "I love you" more often

And mean it. KL.

Go Up Against the Wall of What You Don't Know

This must be said, whether you're into them or not:

Check out Coldplay's new album "Viva La Vida or Death and All His Friends". It's very different, but it will blow you're mind away. It's authentic, deep, and at some points, spiritual. 

Never be afraid to try new things. KL.

Just Because I'm Losing, Doesn't Mean I'm Lost...

I was reminded of an important lesson last night that must be shared:

Never, ever ever give up.

Ever since I could walk, I've been in love with the game of baseball. I remember falling asleep with a baseball hat on while holding my glove - and waking up feeling like a complete dork. Even to this day, there's nothing better than spending an afternoon making diving stops at short or turning double plays with a base runner bearing down on your ankles - spikes up.

I'm playing on a fast pitch softball team and even though I love being out there, we're like the 1992 Phillies. Only 2 out of 14 guys played in high school and we're majorly undersized compared to the other teams. I've never been on a team that lost more than 4 games in an entire season. Before last night, we were 2-7. It's been quite humbling.

But last night was different. We walked up to the field with a "swag" that I haven't seen all season. We were playing the biggest team in the league, the team who everyone talks about as being "unbeatable." They walked onto that field undefeated, cocky, and talented. We walked onto that field with nothing to lose.

The game was back and forth. 2-0 us, 3-2 them, 4-3 us, 5-4 them. And then the last inning came...

With one out and a runner on second, I stepped up to the plate. Now I'll be honest with you, I've struggled this season at the plate. It's been tough adjusting to the close distance, the release point, and the movement on the pitches. But I walked up to the plate and thought to myself, "Never, ever ever give up."

The first pitch was a fastball that I fouled off. The second pitch was high. 1 ball, 1 strike. I was sitting on a fastball and when I saw it, my eyes lit up and I ripped a line drive into the right-center gap. The funny thing is the guy on second is a little overweight but I've never seen someone pump his arms as fast as he did rounding 3rd base. He ended up scoring the tying run and I slid head first into third base. It felt so damn good to stand up, dust the dirt off, and begin to feel the sense that Rocco Mediate sometimes comes out on top. Two batters later, a long drive off the left field fence brought me to the plate where I was met by all my teammates...

A few lessons that I learned:

1) It doesn't matter if they don't believe in you, you must believe in you.

2) Never fear failure. It's better to try and struggle than to give up and live wondering, "What if?"

3) If you strikeout in the first inning, focus on the next at-bat. Forget the past and move on. Regret never changed what already happened.

4) Never, ever ever give up. Regardless.

I love the taste of perseverance, especially in baseball. KL.

The Beauty of June 13

Today I can't help but reflect on the last 365 days.

It's been a long year. A mixture of the worst and the best year of my life.

But I'm so thankful for June 13 because it marks the beginning of something new, something fresh, something right. If it didn't happen, I wouldn't be able to give what I can today.

But storms happen for a reason. Without a little rain, we'd never be able to fully appreciate the sunshine. Even though we may not always see the end of the downpour, we just have to keep walking until we see clear skies.

KL

Love Wins

After sweating through sound check yesterday, I had the opportunity to meet David Ryan Harris. Without trying to be the typical 16 year old fan who goes crazy when meeting a musician, I felt like that little kid inside as I contemplated what to ask this social icon. You may not have heard about him (he's huge on the west coast) but right when you hear his music, you immediately feel something deep within your soul. It's quite beautiful, really.

We talked about what touring with JM is like, the difference between the east coast and the west coast, and where he gets his material. I asked him where he finds his inspiration for his music and he said "Well, musically - Stevie Wonder, lyrically - my wife."

I want that to be my inspiration too.

Have you ever watched couples interact in public? It's actually really funny if your timing is perfect. I was in the supermarket the other day and heard a couple arguing about grape vs. strawberry jelly. The wife asked what he liked more and after he said grape, she said "But we always have grape! I want strawberry" and it was in that exact moment I knew I had to tune in. After the wife argued more for the strawberry, I heard the husband yell "I don't even like jelly!!"

As funny as it is for me to watch couples fight, something needs to change. It seems to me that couples argue about the most trivial things and they don't realize how insignificant their fights become. So stop fighting about the jelly, and the "right" way to get to your friends house (when there's really many ways), and the restaurant where you go out to eat dinner. Life's too short.

Love wins. KL.

Life is so Damn Great

Starting over has become my motivation, my inspiration, my life - and I've developed a deep sense of progression within me. It's quite refreshing to open up your hands and your heart to something (or perhaps someone) new. When you discover the method that works, all the others that didn't no longer matter.

It's so exciting to look back and see the big picture. To see the reason why it all happened and to believe that you are more today than you were yesterday. The journey is absolutely amazing.

So slow down. Take deep breaths. Spend a night with your thoughts and feelings in surround sound. Wear your heart on your sleeve and love others more everyday. Exercise patience with those who love you and those who don't. Don't be afraid to admit when you're wrong. Be peaceful, be compassionate, be kind.

When you feel disappointed, tell someone who cares. When your turned on, hug them tighter than you ever did before - and don't let go. When you're in love, smile from ear to ear and don't ever let anyone take that away from you.

Life is so damn great. KL.

Top 100 Guitar Songs of All-time (Notice #84)

Check out this link:

http://www.rollingstone.com/news/coverstory/20947527/page/2

A Random Playlist of Sweetness

"Come over, early in the morning
Just like a heat wave without warning
And when I touch you my heart begins to flutter
Cause you're smooth and creamy like peanut butter...

I'm gonna flood you like a love river
Ah, baby the postman is about to deliver
I cook you up some dinner, a little pasta
Listen to some music, a little rasta..."
- "Girl I Wanna Lay You Down" ALO

"And in the morning, when I rise
One question, that feels like the sun in my eyes
Am I making the most of this life?

So much trouble and so much strife
And in my guilty hour
Through all of my shame
When all my love is run sour
I have no one else to blame"
- "Make the Most" Brett Dennen

"I will go in this way
And I'll find my own way out
I won't tell you to stay
But I'm coming to much more

Why won't you run in the rain and play?
Let the tears splash all over you..."
- "#41" Dave Matthews Band

"We live in a beautiful world,
Yeah we do, yeah we do"
- "Don't Panic" Coldplay

"No one, no one, no one can get in the way of what I'm feelin
No one, no one, no one can get in the way of what I feel for you..."
- "No One" Alicia Keys

"Why do I beg like a child for your candy?
Why do I come after you like I do?
I love you."
- "Angel" Dave Matthews Band

"I'm not listenin when you say 'Goodbye!'"
- "Semi-Charmed Life" Third Eye Blind

"Don't look down,
Don't feast your eyes on the things that are on the ground
And if it gets hard to focus
When you're traveling at the speed of sound
Feeling nowhere bound
Remember what I told you and
Don't you dare look down..."
- "Don't Look Down" David Ryan Harris

"If you could only see the way she loves me

Then maybe you would understand

Why I feel this way about our love..."

- "If You Could Only See" Tonic

"Sweet like candy to my soul
Sweet you rock and sweet you roll
Lost for you, I'm so lost for you
You come crash into me"
- "Crash Into Me" Dave Matthews Band

"Pain throws your heart to the ground
Love turns the whole thing around
No, it won't all go the way it should
But I know the heart of life is good"
- "Heart of Life" John Mayer

"May put your arms around me
What you feel is what you are
And what you are is beautiful
Do you wanna get married?
Or run away?"
- "Slide" Goo Goo Dolls

"She is everything I need that I never knew I wanted
She is everything I want that I never knew I needed"
-"She Is" The Fray

"And the bright lights turn to night
Until the dawn it brings
Another day to sing about
The magic that was you and me
Cause you and I both loved..."
- " You and I Both" Jason Mraz

"Come away with me and we'll kiss
On a mountaintop
Come away with me
And I'll never stop loving you"
- "Come Away With Me" Norah Jones

"I never thought I'd walk away from you
I did
It's a full sense of accomplishment
Everytime I quit"
- "Pain" Jimmy Eat World

"It's really over, you made your stand
You got me cryin, as was your plan
But when my lonliness is through
I'm gonna find another you...

See when I was your lover
No one else would do
But if I'm forced to find another
I hope she looks like you
Yeah but she's nicer too...

So go on baby,
Make your little get-away
My pride will keep me company
And you just gave yours all away

Now I'm gonna dress myself for two
Once for me and one for someone new
I'm gonna do some things you wouldn't ever let me do

I'm gonna find another you..."

- "I'm Gonna Find Another You" John Mayer






This is just a taste. KL.

It's Alright...

I feel the sense that we have all been disappointed in one way or another and we all need a little clarity in times of brokenness.

With time comes repair, with distance comes vision. But healing must be intentional, it must be pursued. It is vital to put the past behind us and move forward with our lives: otherwise we give our power to the one who hurt us.

I recently read that there's 121 million people struggling with depression worldwide. Refuse to suffer silently, I urge you to talk about it. Sometimes we can't get over it until we've been heard; so be heard.

Losing someone you love is a process to go through; not a destination in which to wallow. We have to keep putting one foot in front of the other and hold our heads high. Dwelling on the negative isn't progression, it's only slowing us down. We're either getting closer to our destination or further away. We must let go of anything that separates us from the goal.

Learn to trust again, realize that they were only one fish in the entire ocean. Be cautious? Sure. But don't let a bad experience keep you from living life to the fullest. We can either go through life happy or disappointed - but the ball's in our court. We have the choice, the power, the ability to decide how we want to come out from under the ashes.

So the question is very simple: How have you come out of the ashes? Do you need to let go of being bitter? Do you need to let the captive free, all the while realizing the entire time that the captive was you?

KL

...Like A Cranberry/Vodka That Looks Much More Clear Than Red...

The only way to dream again is to wake up,
The only way to be you is to be sincere,
The only way to feel again is to let love in.

Much love to you all. KL.

To Write Love On Her Arms...

If you're not familiar with the title of this post, check out this link. The story is beautiful...

This is when grace and truth collide. KL.

A Morning of Nostalgia

"Four more exits to my apartment

But I'm tempted to keep my car in drive

And leave this all behind..."

KL.