808's & Heartbreak

Don't tell me you'll never leave if you've already booked the flight.

Don't tell me you want me to hold you when you don't smell like me.

If you don't want me, don't feed me that "I need you" stuff, I'm a sucker for that.

Check out 808's and Heartbreak - I've been waiting for an album like this.

KL.

June 28, 2009

I've been thinking a lot about this date because it's the annual Philadelphia Triathlon and I'm competing in it for the first time. I've been training for about a month now and feeling stronger each day.

It was cold this past Saturday, like frigid cold. The kind of cold that seeps into your skin and tests your determination like nothing else. I drove past a bank on my way and it said it was 26 degrees outside.

As I began my run, I knew I needed to block out the pain because I knew it would subside at some point. And sure enough, 15 minutes into my run, I felt like I was running on the beach with my bathing suit on. I ran 6.5 miles at a 6:45 pace.

Here's my question- when I run in the gym (with a water bottle, shorts, t-shirt, and a warm facility), I usually run at a 7:15 pace. So how was I able to slice 30 seconds off each mile, 2 minutes and 10 seconds overall (with a sweatshirt, long pants, and running directly into the wind)?

I'm just focused on getting stronger. KL.

Get Back on the Bike

Heroes come in many different forms, functions, and relationships. I've actually never claimed one "hero" in my life, mainly because it sounds so cliche. It sounds so melo-dramatic. But after reading "It's Not About the Bike" by Lance Armstrong, I decided he is one of my heroes.

Reading this book taught me that "fighting" isn't always about flexing the largest financial muscles or accumulating the most "wins" in life - sometimes fighting is about the resilient voice at the end of the day that says, "I will try again tomorrow."

When you think about Lance Armstrong, what's the first image that comes to mind? For most people, it's him wearing the beloved "yellow jersey" (the one that the leader of the race wears) raising his hands in victory, kissing his mom or his wife, with a huge smile on his face.

But if you read his book, you'll see that for every victory, there were 7 setbacks. For every triumph, there were more obstacles. He paints a picture, not of a man wearing the yellow jersey, but of a man stuck in a bed with chemo running through his system - just to stay alive.

He paints a picture of a man who refused to quit, no matter what the "odds" were. He paints a picture of a man who fell off his bike, time after time, but always got back on. He paints a picture of a man who I'm striving to be.

I've been brokenhearted, I've fallen off the bike (a couple times actually), and I've been tempted to quit. I've been tempted to lay on the ground and bitch about my situation. There's probably always going to be that voice in the back of my mind that says, "But what if you can't do it?"

Lance heard that voice too, but refused to listen.

And so do I.

When I was in college, I led a mission trip to Boston. Our goal was to serve the homeless, the orphans, and the widows in the local area for one week. I made a commitment to teach, lead, and organize a group of 15 people.

A girl I was dating at the time was also on the trip. Things got really hectic in our relationship and I told her I needed space to be able to fully dedicate myself to leading the group. We were obviously both upset. She called her dad that night and he flew her home the next morning - and paid for her ticket.

I called my mom. "Mom, I want to come home."

And I will never forget what she said.

"Son, you're not going anywhere. You're staying in Boston and you're going to lead the group because you made a commitment. You're not going to quit. I didn't raise you to give up."

And that's exactly what I did. I got back on the bike.

So here I am, 3 years later, frustrated as hell with where I am in life, but also, more optimistic than I've ever been because I know what I've done in the past when I've fallen off the bike.

Thank you mom, for making me stay in Boston, for making me get back on the bike. KL.

Give Out an "A"

In a world full of assessments, judgements, and measurements sometimes we need to be reminded to see the possibility in people before we measure them up against our standards.

Imagine if you were taking a class that you felt insecure about. For me, it would certainly be science. You already know this course isn't your bread and butter. You sit down on the first day of class, the teacher walks in, and says, "Good morning class - I have an announcement to make. Each of you will receive an "A" for this class as long as you follow 2 rules: be on time and take diligent notes each class."

Rather than being nervous about being measured to the other students, I'd feel an immediate desire to want to do those two simple things: be on time and pay attention. Rather than worrying about seeing that red "F" on my first test, I would be solely focused on paying attention and learning new information.

So here's my idea:

In an effort to be less judgemental and more approachable, I'm going to look at people and give them an "A" rather than waiting for them to screw up and give them a "C" or perhaps even a "D".

It's just a thought - let's realize we're all on a journey, and we may not be together...

But we're getting there. KL.

Worst Best Man

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hM0n3H4eN-0

This video is definitely worth the 44 seconds. KL.

Real Quick

Nothing feels better than being completely honest with yourself.

That's all for now, KL.