Worst Best Man

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hM0n3H4eN-0

This video is definitely worth the 44 seconds. KL.

Real Quick

Nothing feels better than being completely honest with yourself.

That's all for now, KL.

Like A Flask Filled With...Hope.

If you've never heard of Brett Dennen, and if you have $9.99 to spare, go out and purchase his new album called "Hope for the Hopeless." His lyrics are fresh, innovative, and authentic. Even if folk music doesn't "make you go crazy" you just might enjoy the positivism in his message. Check it out.

http://brettdennen.net/

Take care of each other. KL.

Flip It

We can all agree that our country is going through a challenging time. Everyone is talking about it, which is ideal because conversations (hopefully) lead to action, which then (inevitably) leads to change. And we can also all agree that change is necessary - especially now.

Last weekend I was having a conversation about the state of America and my buddy said he thinks the next president is walking into one of the worst times our country has ever seen. Although there's a grain of truth here, I'd like to flip the negative into a positive:

I think the next president has the opportunity to be remembered as the leader who walked us out of the desert - who creates more jobs, who helps stabilize our economy, who helps make our world a more positive place. He has the chance to go down as the man who spurred us back toward greatness.

The intention here isn't political. It goes much deeper than that. Let's flip all the negatives in our experiences and discover the positives. Seeing the negative is natural, seeing the positive isn't.

Let's flip it. KL.

Daughters

After having lunch with a great friend, I realized how important it is to be good to your daughters - and to tell them that they put the color inside your world. She always makes me smile, no matter what we're talking about - and I really care about our friendship.

Here's the point of this short post:

When someone makes you happier than a 6 year old on Christmas morning, be sure they know. When you have a friend that you would do anything for, be sure to make every effort to show it. Be good to each other, think about others before yourself.

That's all for now. KL.

So High - for all the Right Reasons

I love this feeling, of being high.

Now before you assume, hear me out. There's more than one road that can get you "high". After trying almost every approach to living, I've found what doesn't work, still in search for what does. Sometimes you have to go around the block a few times, get frustrated enough, and keep pushing forward (never losing the optimism and the progression) to be able to see and feel which approach is best.

Here's a few approaches I've tried:

-Buying cool new stuff. Only satisfies until the newer, faster, cooler version comes out, which will inevitably be in a couple weeks/months.
-Drinking and other. Doesn't work.
-Selfishness. Really doesn't work.

It's essential to invest in yourself, to take time and discover who you are - and I've spent the last year and a half doing just that. I feel renewed and refueled to be able to reciprocate and give back. I've been thinking about my weekly rhythms and the habits I've developed. I'm not what you would consider a "structured" person. I'm very spontaneous, sometimes unorganized and irresponsible, mostly easy-going with a smile in my heart.

But now I'm reclaiming rhythm in my life.

Yesterday I ran at Peace Valley Park without knowing how far or how long I would run - I just knew I wasn't going to stop, no matter what. Currently I can run 2-3 miles and feel good about the workout, but usually around mile 3, I'm ready for the couch and some Propel - Strawberry Kiwi please.

Today I found out that the trail is 7.2 miles. That's more than double what I usually can run - and it felt like 3 miles after I finished. It really made me wonder about the limitations I subconsciously set in my mind. I wonder what it would look like if I stopped setting limits in my mind and just gave my heart holistically.

When you set a personal goal, and not only reach your goal, but exceed it, you get really high. When you push yourself to your limits and you know that you gave it (whatever the "it" is) everything you had, you'll sleep better, feel better, and love who you are.

Things have really just been going my way lately, so I'm gonna embrace the high as long as I can. KL.

One Word Can Change the World

There is so much to say and sometimes it's all about consolidation, so here's my effort at telling her story.

She used to wear a smile all day long, everything was warm, even the rain felt pleasant. He brought warmth into her heart and she trusted him deeply. But his hands that were once comforting somehow became cold, his smile that was once welcoming somehow became angry. Things changed quite abruptly and she didn't understand why.

She refused to trust, she slept with one eye open - waiting for someone to abandon her again. She thought it was her fault. She felt guilty, ashamed, and lonely.

Years later, she woke to this wonderful realization that life is only as beautiful as she wanted it to be. She found a love in Him that would never let her down, a love that she could actually trust, a love that she welcomed into her heart. She realized that He died on the cross so all injustice might be abolished, so all peace might be rescued, so all trust might be restored.

She realized that there was only one word that could set her free:

LOVE.

She found a way to change the insecure into confident, the awkward into accessible, the guard into an open door. And she discovered it was a beautiful way to live.

Jesus, thank you for loving everyone equally. Thank you for giving your life so we might have peace. Thank you for not throwing the stone. Thank you for running to us.

Thank you for your consistent LOVE.

KL

When You Get to the Finish Line, You've Got to Finish

I'm making a bold prediction:

The Phillies will be the World Series Champions in 2008.

After listening to some Journey, I was reminded...

"Don't stop believin"

So hold on baseball fans, here comes the Fightin Phils.

It's About Time for Me To Shine

I decided to sleep on the beach this weekend and like the sunshine in my eyes, I knew I needed to change some habits in my life. I'd quickly like to share a few things before I detour for a couple months.

1. We live in a beautiful world - with more potential than we can even comprehend.

2. I have much to do.

3. Life is only as good as you make it. If things aren't "right" (whatever 'right' means) re-evaluate the methods and decide to live a different way.

No more living for the pleasure, I'm living for tomorrow. Take care of one another. Don't cut people off in traffic. Hold the door for others. Be practical. Think about the way you're living. Change the world with your own two hands and your own beating heart. Start today.

I'm going silent now, but I will return - when it's back together again. KL.

Middle of the Dance...

This needs to be concise.  

But I've been reminded to be honest with people, no matter what.  Forget what's expected.  If you feel it, let him know - even if it's in the middle of the dance.

Pursue what you believe, love each other.  KL.

On a Rainy Day

After a good nights rest, I woke to a downpour I didn't expect. I planned to take Brewsky (my dog) to the park for a long walk...

And I was reminded that we rarely anticipate the rain to turn into downpour. We subconsciously know it's coming from time to time, but we expect it to drizzle. - but it never just drizzles, does it?

It comes in buckets, in bunches, in storms. Darkness surrounds you and you're drenched. Head to toe - You're covered in rain. You wonder if it's ever going to slow down. You beg for a break, you drop to your knees and pray that it would stop. But it doesn't.

And then you begin to realize that there's a certain beauty being covered in rain. - a beauty you never allowed yourself to see.

Because you begin to see there's a reason for pain. There's a purpose for the downpour. And when you permit your heart and mind to feel that, life somehow makes more sense. You begin to feel the pleasure in pain because you know the storm has an end. Your senses are now filled with optimism and you're more prepared to stare at the next storm right in the eye and say "I'm ready for whatever you've got"

And that's where I am today. KL.

Think "Small" and "Big" Things Result

Have you ever just wanted to get through a certain season of your life to move on to the next phase of your life?

I know I have but I'm learning a big lesson in thinking small, and expecting big.

This weekend, the Phillies will show us what they're really made of. They have a 3 game series with the Mets, who currently lead in the National League East standings by 2 games, after the Phils shut-out the Mets last night 3-0.

But I'd like to talk about something that happened before the opening game of the series. Mike Schmidt, a Hall of Famer, who played on the 1980 team that won the World Series, wrote an email to the entire Phillies team that read:

"Guys, one pitch, one at-bat, one play, one situation, think 'small' and 'big' things result. Tough at-bats, stay up the middle with men on base, whatever it takes to keep the line moving. Hot offense. 27 outs on defense. The Mets know you're better than they are. They remember last year. You guys are never out of the game. Welcome the challenge that confronts you this weekend. You guys are the best. Good luck, #20."

Not only is this message athletically sound, but also theoretically sound. Think "small" and "big" things result. Take one day at a time. Stay tough, remember what you've done in the past but know that this is a new season full of new opportunities. Welcome a challenge. Never give up, you're never out of the "game."

Many of us (me included) want our liabilities to disappear tonight. We want to wake up to the world we always dreamed of when we were children - and after coming full circle with it all (hope---> disappointment---> hope - and always concluding with hope) I've learned to never let the disappointment take away the hope. Never, never, never.

After reading Schmidt's message, I was not only inspired as a Phillies fan but also as a 23 year old trying to find his way in this crazy world. I'm planning on going back to school and I've never been more excited about my future than I am right now. I need to take one day at a time and realize that someday, I'll find a job that I have a deep passion for.

But in the meanwhile, I'm going to think "small" and expect big. KL.

Family Love

This blog has been running around upstairs for quite some time now and I'm sorry that it's long overdue. There are three people in my life who have meant more to me than I could ever express. If you want to know who your real friends are, if you want to know who really cares, look around when the storm hits and you'll see who's got your back. Notice who calls you randomly to see how your doing, who takes you out to dinner just because they know you love Mexican food, or who stands up for you, regardless - and you'll see family.

That's what "family" is all about - Loving each other, supporting each other, and being there for each other when things are going well and when things aren't. Each person has shown me what it means to be family and I'd like to share with you exactly how they've taught me that.

The first person is my Uncle John, one of the most loving people I know. He has given me some of the best advice in the last year or so and when he speaks, I listen. He's sensitive when he needs to be and strong when he needs to be. He always encourages, uplifts, and supports me and that means more than giving $50 for a birthday gift or anything else for that matter. When my parents got divorced, he was there. When "she" fell apart, he was there. When things were said that didn't need to be said, he was there. He has taught me that family supports you, no matter what.

The second person is my Aunt Kathy - my second mom. No one has been more positive, accessible, or unselfish. I know I could call her at anytime in the night and she would be on her way if I ever needed anything. She's taught me about loyalty, the most important characteristic in what it means to be a true friend. She has listened to me process so many things and has given me advice when it's needed - without judging. She knows when to talk and when to listen, which is so rare. Sometimes I just need someone to listen to me and she always does that so well. If it wasn't for my Aunt Kathy, I honestly have no idea where I'd be - but it wouldn't be pretty. She has been a life-saver for me in more than one occasion. I love her so much because her actions actually back up her words, which is quite refreshing. She's the perfect example of what an aunt should be.

The third person is my mom who has taught me so much because she didn't defend me when the teachers said I was being disrespectful in class. When I've been in financial trouble, rather than paying my way (which I know she wanted to do) she's taught me the value of working hard for something and fully appreciating it. She understands that the best sometimes feels the worst, but she's always been there to hear me out. I couldn't imagine having a mom that loves her 2 boys more than Maryann does. The only person I wanted to talk to on June 13th was my mom. She's the best mom a son could ever ask for.

I write this simply to highlight what family looks like.

The point: Love your family and appreciate them.

KL.

I Am My Brother's Keeper

Last night America witnessed one of the greatest speeches ever delivered, made by a man with integrity, respect, and compassion for a country that so desperately needs change. I'm convinced that Barack Obama has the philosophies, morals, and commitments to reclaim the American promise that we all long for. He's a man who deeply cares about all the hard-working middle class Americans, which is refreshing considering the last 8 years.

His speech hit every note on the scale - everything from the failures of the last 8 years to his plan for taxes, oil independence, education, health care, and most importantly - his plan to end this war responsibly. Thank you Barack Obama - it's about time for change.

He referred back to John F. Kennedy's concept of "intellectual, moral strength" and the idea that we all have to do our part to make this world a better place. Changing this world isn't about one man standing on a podium and making claims of change: changing this world is about all of us reclaiming the Golden Rule (which first came from the ultimate revolutionary: Jesus) and all of us living lives of self respect, hard work, and love for one another. Programs won't automatically make this world a better place, people will.

We need a president with fresh ideas, with humility to admit when he's made a mistake, and with a belief that there is more to this world than what we actually see. We need a president who is willing to take a stand for the average American and still holding onto the morals that our country was originally established on.

Last night, Obama said, "We must restore our moral standing, so that America is once again that last hope for all who are called to the cause of freedom, for all who long for lives of peace, for all who yearn for a better future..."

He also mentioned that we can all agree that we need to reduce the amount of unwanted pregnancies in this country, that we can uphold the 2nd Amendment while keeping guns out of the hands of criminals and people who are capable of producing the shootings similar to Virginia Tech, and that gays and lesbians should be able to live lives free of discrimination.

We may disagree about the methods to get there, but at the end of the day, all of these issues must be improved in our country. Both Democrats and Republicans should all be able to disagree on these issues without questioning the character and patriotism of each other. Patriotism does not have a party. We need to stop bringing each other down and start working together as a unit to make this world a better place. We all need to reclaim our sense of common purpose to experience the American promise.

Obama continued, "This election is not about me, it's about you! We cannot turn back now, we must march forward and hold firmly without wavering to the faith that we profess..."

Wherever you find yourself on the political spectrum, do yourself a favor and be responsible with the words you use regarding this election. This is the only "political" post you'll hear from me. I just really sense that Barack Obama is the start of something positive in this great country that we live in. Be sure to vote on November 4, 2008. Stand up for what's right but also pray for the grace to cover us when we're a little off.

Obama 08. KL.

Heart's Catching Up...

I've been really reflective the last few weeks.

My mind feels like it needs to slam on the brakes so my heart can just catch up a little bit. I lay in bed with thoughts constantly running through my head. Thoughts of contentment, thoughts of vulnerability, thoughts of love.

I've been distracted by this idea that people walk in and out of our lives and before we know it, we never see them again. In the blink of an eye, everything changes, and there's no prerequisite that could prepare you for this course. You never thought you'd lose them but here you are, years later, missing them more than you ever imagined.

But I have this hope, this monumental belief, this deep thought racing through my mind that carries me from one day to the next:

"I believe that my life's gonna see the love I give return to me." -JM

I'm just going to keep loving, no matter what. Love's the only thing in life you can't over-indulge in. You can have too much ice cream, too much of "self", too much money. You can have too much of almost everything - except love. And without love, we have absolutely nothing to live for. So please don't stop loving one another because with it, life can be experienced in its fullest potential.

Now it may not be returned tonight, and that's alright. It doesn't have to be. I'm just going to trust that at the end of my life, as long as I stay where the light is, it will all be returned to me.

And I can rest in that hope, just give me a second for my heart to catch up.

KL

Heart in my Hands...

I've been torn but not broken. I've been through the furnace but not burned. I've taken some hard punches but now I'm ready to throw a couple jabs of my own. Hope you're ready.

You thought you knew me, but you had no idea. If you saw me now, you wouldn't recognize me - because I'm bigger than my body gives me credit for.

I'm better than I've ever been (like Kanye said), tougher than I've ever been, and more progressive than I've ever been. All of which are leading me to where I've always wanted to be. But I assure you, it's not going to fall into my lap. It never has and it never will. I've accepted that and moved on.

I've had to make it happen for myself - for the most part, you will too. So now I continue the journey of making it happen for myself, regardless of the cost.

Change is right around the corner, meanwhile I'm gonna stand on the steps with my heart in my hands.


KL.

Say What Ya Need To Say

Isn't it about time I start being authentic, regardless of what it involves? Isn't it time I choose truth, no matter what the cost?

This week I've been reminded that plans don't always work out as we think they will.

This week I've had many opportunities to be honest and it felt so good to be sincere with myself and with other people. I've tasted independence, freedom, and self-sufficiency for some time now and it resembles a King Size Snickers bar. For so long I avoided these concepts because of my fear of loneliness. And then I met someone who reminded me that one doesn't always invite the other.

Someone can be an amazing person, a beautiful individual, an intricate personality - but different people have different lives. It's more important to end a relationship with integrity than waste someones time. I'm all about simplifying, identifying the most efficient method possible, and waiting for the right timing when it all feels like a dream.

I've met so many people who would do anything to escape a current relationship but haven't the stability to actually go through with it - so they settle in and become static. They forsake truth for comfort, real love for empathy, freedom for control.

Sometimes truth is the negative conversation we need to go through to arrive at our peaceful destination.

I want us to be honest beginning a relationship and honest concluding it. I want us to stop burning bridges. Say you want to just be friends and mean it. Act on it. Check on each other. Treat others the way you would want to be treated.

Be quick to forgive, slow to speak, and even slower to anger. Think about your words before you use them. Everything happens for a reason, please don't ignore the signs. When you feel it, you'll know. But until then, just enjoy the heart of life...

And never forget that these concepts are beautiful ways to live.

And that Jesus came up with them long before I did. KL.

Balance

Most people are either on one side of the spectrum or the complete opposite. Believe me when I say I was too (and still am from time to time) but I'm searching for something that can change it all. Something that brings consistency, contentment, and ultimately happiness.

I'm searching for balance, for equilibrium, for something to hold onto.

We can either be too straightforward or too passive. Either too rational or too impulsive. Either too cold hearted or too sensitive. Either too serious or too nonchalant.

So slow down and think about where you find yourself on the continuum.

Keep on loving, we're almost there. KL.

From Nothing to Something

I just finished one of the most depressing/optimistic testimonies out there these days. Eric Clapton was a man who was full of addictions of all sorts: music, sex, fishing, collectables, and the most deadly of all, hard drugs. Even though this would seem to lead to his downfall, it's what made him one of the greatest guitarists to ever strap in to play. He never did anything half-assed and I can respect that.

He describes his addictions and explains how devastating it was for his friends and family to witness. The first forty years of this man's life were filled with disappointment, death, abandonment, confusion, insecurity, and lonliness - and that's not an exageration by any means. He got to the point where he couldn't go a few hours without some sort of drug to get him through. He was drinking 2 bottles of vodka a day. It got extremely ugly.

And then the straw that broke the camels back slapped him in the face. Conor, his 4 year old son, fell 53 floors out of a high-rise apartment to his tragic death.

And it's in these moments where you see the character of an individual.

It's in these moments where God does His most magnificient work...

"At that moment, almost of their own accord, my legs gave way and I fell to my knees. In the privacy of my room I begged for help. I had no notion who I was talking to, I just knew I had come to the end of my tether, I had nothing left to fight with. Then I remembered what I had heard about surrender, something I thought I could never do, my pride just wouldn't allow it, but I knew that on my own, I wasn't going to make it, so I asked for help, and getting down on my knees, I surrendered.

From that day until this I have never failed to pray in the morning, on my knees, asking for help, and at night, to express gratitude for my life, and most of all, for my sobriety.

I choose to kneel because I need to humble myself when I pray, and with my ego, this is the most I can do.

If you are asking why I do this, I will tell you...because it works. It's as simple as that. In all this time I've
been sober, I have never once seriously thought of taking a drink or a drug."

And that's straight from a man who spent forty years disregarding the presence of God. That's straight from a
man who has been to hell and back. That's from a man who has been completely humbled by the grace of God.

It's such a beautiful story because something so self-defeating became something that has changed thousands of lives. Eric Clapton started the "Crossroads Centre" in Antigua which is a rehab treatment center for all kinds of addictions. It exists to help individuals and their families whose lives are controlled by alcohol, drugs or other compulsive behaviors – helping them to make the changes necessary to find new health, a new sense of well-being and a new life of recovery.

It's a beautiful thing when God takes something ugly and makes it wonderful again. Check out Eric Clapton's Autobiography and you'll see what I mean.

KL.

Reign of Love

Hold on.

Be good to one another.

Spend time with your thoughts in surround sound.

Don't worry about yesterday.  The sun will rise tomorrow.

Don't recycle revenge.  Stop it with you.

No one will fire if you wave the white flag and put the weapons down.  Whether it's a thought or a word - please be peaceful.

Don't "wait" for the world to change, you be the change you want to see in the world.  Realize it starts with individuals deciding they want a different life, a different vibe, a different world.

Listen more and talk less.  

Engage those who appear lost.  Listen to their story.

See more shows - art shows, concerts, galleries, etc.  Appreciate someone else's talents.  Root for them.

Seek truth and realize you will never have it all nailed.  

Travel and admit that there's a much bigger world out there than you.

Much love to all.  KL.